Saved from attempted rape
One night, as I opened my bedroom door to go to the kitchen for a glass of water, the light from my room shone on a man crouched in the hall in front of me. It felt surreal. I screamed, hoping that my roommate, asleep in the bedroom next to mine, would come to help me, but she didn’t hear me.
The intruder leapt up, grabbed me, and pushed me into my bedroom. He wrapped a pillowcase around my head and forced me onto the floor. My mind was racing, and I felt certain he was there to rape me. I didn’t physically fight him, and didn’t know what he’d do if I screamed again, so I went quiet. It was then that I felt a knife on my back.
The words “I can’t breathe” came out of my mouth as a plea for him to remove the pillowcase from around my head. He became angry, pushed the side of the knife blade a little harder against my back and told me to shut up. The room felt filled with mental darkness, and I thought my life was over.
I reached out to God with my whole being. I wholeheartedly surrendered to God’s good will and quickly reasoned that God was my only help. I became aware only of God, divine Love, filling all space and being the only power of the universe. It felt as if a veil were being lifted, and I wasn’t afraid.
After a moment of this deep communion with divine Love, the feeling in the room began to change. The man had been hurried, agitated, and anxious, but now I could feel God’s calming presence as I prayed and affirmed God as the saving power. I could feel fear dissipating. I felt filled with the power of God as I said aloud with conviction, “You don’t have to hurt me. God loves you; you are a good man. God loves me, too. I am God’s cherished daughter. God is filling this room right now, and He loves you.”
The words flowed from a place inside me I hadn’t known was there. I felt the unmistakable protective power and love of God. The tenor of the room went from excruciating fear to palpable love. The experience felt like being enveloped in a warm presence. I knew God was my Father-Mother, soothing my fear.
The intruder’s demeanor drastically changed. The knife was put away, and the pillowcase was removed from my head. He seemed calm as he pulled me off the floor and walked me to my roommate’s room, staying behind me so I would not see his face. He pushed my roommate’s door open and shoved me onto the floor. Then he ran down the stairs and out the front door.
By this time, my roommate had woken up. Neighbors who had heard the commotion also came to help. But I was not afraid anymore. I was in speechless awe and deeply humbled. When the police came and questioned me for hours, I couldn’t stop talking about how I’d been protected. (Later, I learned that this man had tried to attack someone else and had been killed. Despite this outcome, I trusted that he would be able to repent of his crimes, since evil is not natural to God’s children.)
The opening lines of Hymn 370 from the “Christian Science Hymnal” kept playing in my mind:
We are hid with Christ forever
In the Father’s holy plan.
In this pure eternal union
We behold the perfect man.
(Nellie B. Mace, © CSBD)
When I arrived at work the next day, I felt free, despite the events of the previous night. I was also inspired to resign from an assignment at work that had made me feel mentally burdened and dark and to return to the essential work I loved.
“Whither shall I go from thy spirit? or whither shall I flee from thy presence? If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there. If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea; even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me” (Psalms 139:7-10).
Adapted from a testimony published in the Feb. 14, 2022, issue of the Christian Science Sentinel.
